Episode 540

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Published on:

25th Nov 2025

Ep. 540 Tom Pfanner: The 5 Levels Every Dad Must Master (Before It's Too Late)

When Thomas Pfanner's eighth-grade son walked out of his life for six months, he realized something had to change - and it wasn't his son. In this powerful conversation, Thomas breaks down his FORGE framework (Faith, Ownership, Respect, Groundbreaking Adventure, and Expectation) from his new book "Dads Who Lead," revealing why teen rebellion happens and how fathers can shift from being the "police officer dad" to becoming a trusted guide. We dive deep into the critical mistake most dads make (focusing on changing the kid instead of changing themselves), the concept of your "dad brand," why listening is more powerful than lecturing, and how to create groundbreaking adventures that build unshakeable bonds. Thomas shares practical strategies for handling the daily friction of homework, screens, and expectations, while maintaining the bigger vision for who our kids are becoming. Whether your kids are still young or you're in the thick of teenage rebellion, this episode offers a roadmap for showing up as the father your family needs - starting with mastering yourself first.

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Each week Ned sits down with a dad and asks him to open up his field notes and share with other men who find themselves on the Adventure of Fatherhood. Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review!

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About the Podcast

Fatherhood Field Notes
Fatherhood Field Notes is where we hear real stories from real men living real lives every week. Fatherhood is not only about being a dad, it incorporates providing and serving a home, loving and serving a spouse, engaging and serving in a community, as well as intentionally serving your children. Fatherhood is an adventure, one full of fun, wild, and messy stories. In this podcast, we will hear stories from real men who have found themselves living the Adventure of Fatherhood. The Craft of Fatherhood episodes are 5-10 minute episodes where your guide Ned Schaut shares stories on his own fatherhood journey.

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Hector Santiesteban